It's hard to think through the mess in her head, but Ainsley manages to get the supplies like Malcolm told her to. It's fine. They'll get rid of it. Malcolm will make it all go away.
She pauses as she fills a cleaning bucket with various cleaners and takes a slow, deep breath in, and out. If she just keeps telling herself that Malcolm will make it all okay, somehow, the way he's always made things okay since she was little, maybe she will believe it.
Finally, she walks back to the living room with the supplies. "Okay... what do you need me to do?"
He looks at her when she comes back with the supplies and then back at the body on the floor. His sister's handiwork. The profiling part of his brain, never turned off, recognizes a crime of passion, of desperation, and how different it is from their father's murders. He shouldn't be thinking about that. His little sister isn't like the Surgeon.
Malcolm draws in a breath and looks to her. "I'll do it. I'll take care of it. You shouldn't have to."
He couldn't pull the trigger. She shouldn't have to get her hands dirtier than they already are. And he doesn't know if dealing with a corpse will trigger something in her. That state that she was in for the moments when she plunged the knife into Endicott. Will making her come face to face with that splinter her more?
She's not sure what she expected, really, but somehow that wasn't it. A frown crosses her face and she hesitates for a moment before she finally settles on asking, "Are you sure?" She didn't expect him to take over completely-- this was her mess, shouldn't she be the one cleaning it up?
He barks a soft, incredulous laugh at, well, the whole situation. "I'm not sure of anything right now, Ains," he answers. "I know what I've got to do in the abstract sense but..." But he has no idea how he's actually going to bring himself to move a body, dispose of it, clean a crime scene and cover up a murder. That's settling in on him. He doesn't do this; covering up crimes is what his father did. What people like Watkins did. But what other choice does he have?
"I'm sorry," she breathes out, a broken sort of sound that just gushes out of her lungs, the hint of a sob that doesn't quite catch.
She doesn't know what else to say, how the hell she's supposed to process any of this. And here Malcolm was, cleaning up her mess. He always did, didn't he? Maybe that's just what big brothers do, but this is so far outside that line that Ainsley can't help but feel guilty about it.
"Don't be sorry," he says gently, stopping what he is doing to look over at her. "I wanted to do it." And he can't, but that's another story. "It'll be okay. Mom will be upset when I destroy this rug but..." he says, trying to bring a levity that feels unearned to the situation. That's something they'll have to deal with--replacing the rug. That seems like a task he can give her later. For now, he needs...
The list starts to come together. More than just cleaning supplies. "Are you sure that you're up to helping?" he asks carefully.
The attempt at levity works, to an extent. At least it earns him a half-hearted huff of breath passed between her lips. Not quite a laugh, but close enough, all things considered, right? "She is gonna be pissed... it's her favorite one."
His question seems to steal all the air from her lungs. She doesn't know how to answer that, which is the answer all on its own, isn't it? "...No...? But you shouldn't have to do it by yourself."
"We might have to find a replacement. See if there's one like it out there that we can buy?" Maybe if they can find the exact same one, she won't notice. He isn't sure about how possible that is but his mind is going a million miles a minute and the rug is one detail they'll have to deal with eventually.
He looks back to Endicott's body. "I'm going to have to dismember him. Moving a whole body is...he weighs more than me so moving pieces will be easier. Are you going to be able to handle that?"
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branchandroot
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Date: 2021-01-14 03:10 am (UTC)She pauses as she fills a cleaning bucket with various cleaners and takes a slow, deep breath in, and out. If she just keeps telling herself that Malcolm will make it all okay, somehow, the way he's always made things okay since she was little, maybe she will believe it.
Finally, she walks back to the living room with the supplies. "Okay... what do you need me to do?"
no subject
Date: 2021-01-14 09:59 pm (UTC)Malcolm draws in a breath and looks to her. "I'll do it. I'll take care of it. You shouldn't have to."
He couldn't pull the trigger. She shouldn't have to get her hands dirtier than they already are. And he doesn't know if dealing with a corpse will trigger something in her. That state that she was in for the moments when she plunged the knife into Endicott. Will making her come face to face with that splinter her more?
no subject
Date: 2021-01-16 12:31 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-01-16 12:56 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-01-24 12:55 am (UTC)She doesn't know what else to say, how the hell she's supposed to process any of this. And here Malcolm was, cleaning up her mess. He always did, didn't he? Maybe that's just what big brothers do, but this is so far outside that line that Ainsley can't help but feel guilty about it.
no subject
Date: 2021-01-24 01:50 pm (UTC)The list starts to come together. More than just cleaning supplies. "Are you sure that you're up to helping?" he asks carefully.
no subject
Date: 2021-01-24 03:03 pm (UTC)His question seems to steal all the air from her lungs. She doesn't know how to answer that, which is the answer all on its own, isn't it? "...No...? But you shouldn't have to do it by yourself."
no subject
Date: 2021-01-24 09:34 pm (UTC)He looks back to Endicott's body. "I'm going to have to dismember him. Moving a whole body is...he weighs more than me so moving pieces will be easier. Are you going to be able to handle that?"